Phelps Bong Water Furor

In light of the Michael Phelps bong faux pas and his 2004 DUI charge, people are again talking about athletes as role models.  How horrible his actions are.  What a disappointment.  Blah. Blah.  People it’s a bong.  Nobody was raped, shot, or killed.  So calm down.

Phelps said: “I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment. I’m 23 years old and despite the successes I’ve had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again.”

No, I wasn’t impressed by his apology, or with how his handlers initially tried to cover it up.  But get over it people.  This is where parents are supposed to step in and explain to their young and impressionable kids what is going on.  There really isn’t a need for media hand wringing over it, the loss in endorsement deals should be enough to get it through Phelps’ head that cellphone cameras are dangerous and people are opportunists so watch your back when you want to party.  Ok, that and Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane (real name: Leon Lott) who wants to look into pressing criminal charges, because the photo was taken at a University of South Carolina house party in his jurisdiction of Richland County.

The Wall Street Journal has an article “Phelps Image as Hero Hurt by Photos”.  Stop!  He is not a hero, he’s an incredibly gifted athlete.  The word “hero” should be reserved for firefighters, police officers, soldiers, and emergency room staff– generally people making a sacrifice.  There is nothing “heroic” about swimming really fast or catching a game winning touchdown while making millions of dollars in the process.  In the big scheme of things we enjoyed watching, but no lives were saved.  As you can see I have a problem with athletes being casts as role models and heroes.

The most amusing part of all this to me is that, the World Anti-Doping Agency, the authorities that oversee Olympic competition and create the policy for drug use in sports– doesn’t have a big problem with marijuana.  Its not a performance in enhancing drug and its not on their list of substances banned at all times.  So I guess the message is, its legal just not during the game or tournament.

For the most part the guidelines make sense, there are two types of banned drugs– those that are banned at all times and those that are banned during actual competition.

Banned all the times: Anabolic steroids, hormone treatments, diuretics and masking agents, oxygen enhancers.

Banned during competition: Stimulants, narcotics, marijuana, glucocorticosteroids, alcohol, beta blockers.  I understand why alcohol would be banned in some sports like archery, auto racing, poweboating– but bowling!?